The I Chong by Tommy Chong

Author:Tommy Chong
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Simon Spotlight Entertainment
Published: 2006-07-15T00:00:00+00:00

Chapter Eight

Chûn / Difficulty at the Beginning

K’an / Chên

If we persevere, things will work out.

There it was, the federal prison, completely surrounded by miles and miles of chain-link fences topped by coils of razor wire. The reality of my absurd situation sank in as all the feelings of denial that this wasn’t really happening to me left. Shelby clung to me tightly as the limo drove the last two hundred yards, slowly crawling over the speed bumps. Steve stared at the onerous sight of the prison. I could almost hear the words as he mentally wrote the piece for Vanity Fair. I suddenly felt like I was in a movie, shooting the parting scene, with “Via Con Dios” by Les Paul and Mary Ford softly playing in the background.

“Now the time has come to part, a time for weeping.”

Tears flooded from Shelby’s beautiful face. I had always loved the way she cried, because her mouth would part as if she were smiling. She clung to me and kept saying, “No! No! No!”

I whispered softly, “It’s going to be all right. It’s going to be all right.” We held each other for what seemed to be a long time. I could feel the guard’s impatience as he paced behind us. Shelby finally pulled away and turned and walked out the door with Steve. She never looked back and I knew why. The last night we just spent together, we talked about just driving up to Canada and losing ourselves in the wilds of BC, where we would live like Indians, far into the bush, where no white man would venture. She knew if she looked back, there was a chance that I would run, just hop into the limo and head to Canada.

My love for my wife was so strong that I could have gone to my death happy that day knowing that no matter what happened nothing could change the years of love we had together. I was in awe of the power of the love I felt that day. I could feel her love surge inside me, giving me strength to face my uncertain future behind bars.

The prison guard spoke, breaking the spell. “I’m sorry, Mr. Chong, but I have to handcuff you now. It’s just a formality, so if you would put your hands behind you…” He slipped the cuffs on me and led me through the door and then removed them. This would be the only time I was handcuffed throughout this whole ordeal. I was then led into a holding cell and told to strip naked. The prison guard, who was a fan, told me that I better get used to stripping naked to be searched because “this dance is done on a regular basis.” I stripped off the gray sweat clothes that I had just put on and stood there naked.

“Okay, now pick up your ball sack! Now squat and cough!” (The squat and cough is done to dislodge any contraband one might have up his ass.

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